writer’s block + quitting nanowrimo

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This post is mainly a rambling and slightly consists of some complaining, bear with me.

November is a special time for many writers, it’s when the writing community seems to be most active, NaNoWriMo. Also known as National Novel Writing Month. It’s when authors around the world attempt to write a 50,000 page manuscript in 30 days. It’s challenging, it’s fun, and it’s something I’ve attempted and failed since 2013.

It’s November 11th and today is a day of mourning. Although several days behind in NaNoWriMo because of some personal mishaps, I had a project that I was working on and was fairly passionate about. I made the fatal mistake of not backing up my work and lost all the writing on day 11. I have an earlier draft but it lacks thousands of words I’d added more recently. I’m now begrudgingly not opening the file and trying to come up with a new concept to write.  Maybe I’ll write a compilation of different dates happening at the same time, maybe a suburban love, maybe return to my old fantasy novel, maybe a short story. I just need to write but I can’t seem to get past a sentence. I’ve typed and deleted a dozen first sentences. Nothing seems write.

They range anywhere from “the sun shone through the dark green leaves, casting a strange shadow on the bleached sidewalk” to “my finger was in your bum”.

The writers block is real, friends.

The only thing I can seem to get out is this journal like rambling about how much I can’t write. The irony doesn’t escape me.

But really, I’m not sure why I’m being so hard on myself when today I got the first paperback proofs of my upcoming release “I Love You”. I should spend some time celebrating my achievement of finally finishing that book. I’ve decided that I’m going to give NaNoWriMo a break and really accept defeat for the fifth year in a row. I’ll use this time to connect with the wonderful writers who are actually participating and maybe do the one thing I wish I did more of, read.

I’ve realized by scarcely reading, I’m hindering myself from becoming a better writer and if there’s one thing I’m committed to, it’s becoming a better, more prolific writer. So that being said, maybe I’ll do NaNoReaMo? Hehe National Novel Reading Month? Except it’s not national and its just me doing this but still. My new unrealistic goal is to a read a new book every day of this month. I used to consume at least one book a day. Some days I read up to three. Maybe it’s time to commit to go back to that, if only for two weeks. Can I do it?

Let us see, friends.

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